Sturm und Mom

The Storm & Stress (& Joy) of Motherhood

Archive for the tag “photography”

Am I a Narcissistic Psycho for Putting My Kids’ Pictures on My Blog?

No, really.  That’s a real question for you all, not a prelude for me to shout in ALL CAPS for the next 400 words about how everything is OK.  I’m wondering if I’ve made a mistake decorating this page with pictures of my still-minor children.

All this comes down to those nasty Stats and Search Engine Terms.  Yesterday, I had a (mild) spike in traffic (for those of you with lives and not blogs 😉 that means visitors to my blog page,) and upon closer investigation, it all came from a Google Image Search from Switzerland.  Which reminded me that “Boy Playing with Barbie” brings up Big Boy as the 5th top image in Google — at least on my computer since Google and other search engines trick us into thinking the little customized version of the world that they present us is the same for everyone.   But it started to creep me out, and leads me to wonder where were my kids’ pics are going, who was looking, and would they end up somewhere weird one day.  Its not just creepy deviants — are these photos going into advertising, viral emails, Internet memes?  Are their faces going to be Photoshopped into the Joke of the Day at the latest Lumpen Prol Mock Site?

I’m trying to not have delusions of grandeur here.  My kids — while they will always remain in my eyes the most beautiful creatures alive — realistically land the middle band of “pleasant” in the attractiveness scale.  And Ansel Adams I ain’t (which is probably good because I don’t think he was known for his portraiture.)   And I know that “everyone does it,” and with no ill effects so far for the most part.  Plus, kid shots are 96% of the photos that I have.  It’s them or the tulip, baby.

This has really started to bother me, to the point that I thought about pulling down my blog while I figured it out.  However, considering my deep seated aversion to quitting anything even when it sucks, the whole idea of giving up caused me too much anxiety, and I had to write a blog post to calm down.  *Sigh*  What’s a crazy person to do?

Am I a terrible woman using the likeness of my unsuspecting offspring to attract eyeballs in a feeble attempt to brand myself, never considering the long term damage my profligate posting may be doing?  Or am I just a boring old housewife livening up the drab Internet with my random pics of innocence and domestic bliss?

Psycho or Mrs. June Cleaver?  I guess I’ll just have to think about it.  Feel free to wade in below.  In the meantime, here’s that picture of the tulip.

Update! I took Dr. Drew’s Online Narcissism Test and out of a possible score of 40, I got a 4 (the average is 15.) So, I might be crazy, but I’m probably not a Narcissist. I’m going to go think about myself for a while — looks like I’ve fallen down in that area so far….might explain why my idea of me-time is folding laundry.

It’s the Week Before Christmas…

…and all through this house, I am running at full speed to get ready for the holiday.  But with a joyful heart.  Bring it on!

However, that doesn’t leave much time for blogging, but I hope to post a few more times before Sunday.  In the meantime, I’ve learnt a few things in the last few days that I would like to share.

Stuff I’ve Just Learnt (or Re-learnt)

People Are Awesome

I was at the Opening Day Sale at a new Safeway by our house with four (yes,1-2-3-4) kids age 6 and under, because I just positively, had to get their One Day Only 2/$5 butter (and yes, that is the cheapest you will ever see butter around here.)  The kids were very good, and I cheerfully settled in for the 30 minute wait to check out.   Then the lady in front on me insisted that I go ahead of her.  She said that I didn’t know how long I had before my mini-powder kegs went off.  What a terrific person!  I truly hope she has the merriest Christmas ever.  It also reminded me to pay it forward.  When the kids are older, I will remember and go around doing good deeds for Moms with little ones.  If I don’t, please feel free to remind me on Facebook, which by that point nano technology will have embedded on the inside of our eyelids.

Babies in Santa Hoods are Also Awesome

Goof Off Dissolves Silly Putty Inside Gloves

I (re-)learnt that when you ask a nearly-7 year old, “Did you put the Silly Putty in your glove?” she hears, “Did you intend for the Silly Putty in your hand to melt into your glove lining, ensuring that your Mother will spend 20 minutes tonight breathing in noxious fumes, and then 45 minutes tomorrow trying to get rid of the smell?” She answered “No.”
(The Silly Putty and smell are both gone. Yippee extremely toxic smelling miracle juice!)

When Mom Gets Mad, It Counts

The kids all told me that when I get mad, it means super trouble. Apparently, I never lose my temper unless it’s, to quote Sweetie Pie, “like, you’re a Serial Killer, or something.” She also wanted to know why if cereal was healthy for you are serial killers the most evil type of murderer? But I digress. Apparently, I can also use my powers of just anger on my Significant Other. Tall Girl was riding shotgun in the truck with my Sweetie and he called another driver a rude name. Tall Girl wanted a definition. Dad refused. “That’s okay, Dad. I’ll just tell Mom what you said, you’ll get into trouble, and she’ll tell me anyway.” She stared at him, arms crossed, expression smug.
“Go ahead.” He said.
He told her what it meant 5 minutes later.

Middle Children Have it Hard

I learnt this whenArt Girl began treating her younger sister rather shabbily. I realized it was because Princess has been bragging that she is starting Kindergarten next year, and this means that “School Youngest” Art Girl, now becomes another middle child there as well. I’ve been trying to help her out, but I guess this is one thing she is going to have to work out herself. If only would believe me when I tell her she’s such a great big sister.

The Best Way to Avoid a Stressful Christmas Dinner is Planning

Note the diagram mapping out where all the food is going in the fridge. I think ahead.

Real Christmas Trees are Super Awesome

Neither my Sweetie or I had had one of these beauties since we were kids, and now we are hooked. Oh well, what’s an extra $100 a year. But the smell…

 

Blueberry, the Pom Pom Monster, Cannot Survive Baby, the Destructo Monster


Sorry Art Girl.

Well, I didn’t know that the last few days were so illuminating. Good luck with your Christmas preparation, and may the last few days of your Advent be very blessed.

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