Cute stuff kids do, that adults can’t get away with
“Mommy, I made you a picture book.” She handed me a series of drawings stapled together. The title?
I am Special. Yep, this super cute booklet which made me feel a whole lot better (really!) was all about how special SHE was. I started thinking: What if an adult did that?
“I’m so sorry your mother died. Here. I thought a photo book of myself might cheer you up. Look – on the last page I made a collage of all my trophies and achievements!”
So on that note, I started brainstorming things that kids do that are so damn cute, but wouldn’t wash as an adult.
– Repeatedly misrepresent your age.
– Draw a picture of a Princess that looks like it’s actually a goose.
– Invite strangers to your birthday party.
– Refer to yourself as “a big boy.”
– Tell your mother that don’t want to marry her anymore.
– Watch the same 10 episodes of your favourite TV show over and over and over, again.
– Apply lip gloss to your eye lids and brows.
– Pair flip flops with a dress shirt and cords.
– Take food into the bathroom.
– Believe that “chicken” the food and “chicken” the animal, are two totally different things.
– Insist that inanimate objects be served the same breakfast as you.
– Wear a hat 3 sizes too small.
– Plan on having your wedding catered by McDonald’s.
– Ask everyone at the table if you can try their food and drink.
– Ask someone “if they were alive back then.”
– “Do you want to see a picture of me as a baby?”
– Want to take medicine because you enjoy the taste.
– Repeat the joke you just heard from the person beside you, because it got a laugh.
– Put on a puppet show with Popsicle sticks.
Now that I list it out, childhood seems like the Diplomatic Immunity of weird behavior. Enjoy it while it lasts, kids. Your underwear on head days are numbered.